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The heart of self-reflection, Highs, and Lows of 2019

Learning comes about not from doing, but from thinking about what we do.”-Unknown

I have been part of a Christian family, Urban Vision. One of the practices that I have learned is how life-giving self-reflection can be. Processing on my actions and experiences teaches me how I can react differently as a way to process feelings and thoughts that can come up and taking the time to process.

I was sick for 4 years, I had no capacity to do anything extra, but sleep and watch movies all day. I had this ache of wanting to achieve to my best ability that I knew was hidden away from being so sick. I now find it important to reflect, and I want to share with you my reflection of 2 019. Reflection can either be over the past year and looking back on what I have accomplished because every achievement gives me a sense of pride and affirmation since I live with chronic illness.

Life can be hectic and feel full, and you may not have time to get away and sit and reflect, do it before the next meeting, job, etc. Self-reflection doesn’t have to be long. Reflection can be as simple as asking yourself what’s on top for you. Self-reflection emphasises your need for self-care being intentional for yourself. I was once told “What’s the point of caring for others if you don’t care about yourself? You come first! It’s OK to take time for you!

The benefits of Reflection

Becoming self-aware of how you could react to a situation differently, so when a similar situation arises you can try to react more positively. self-reflection also can teach new and life-long skills on how you respond to an aspect of your life that you feel need to be unraveled and the questions and thoughts you have, like a conflict that has happened or how thankful you are. (thanking God, buddha or a friend and family member). Cry, get mad, allow yourself to process any emotions that have been pushed aside or you have left you true emotions, to this time of reflection.

What reflection can look like

  • Talk to yourself, or write it down, no one is judging or listening it’s just you and your thoughts.

  • Keep a journal, write or draw a picture, write a poem, lyrics

  • Read an inspiring story, that makes you grateful and gives you a zest for life,

  • Think of positives, what you’ve achieved so far

  • Give yourself the “sandwich approach”, say a positive, a negative and finish on a positive

  • Talk to yourself, no one is listening, or judging you.

Here are some questions to think about, to get you started thinking about your life

  • How do you feel about you, do you like who you are? do you live life practicing your core values?

  • What are your insecurities, what do you think you should work on yourself?

  • Why did you react in that way, how could you of reacted?

Identify your goals, achievements,

  • What progress have you made to get closer to the dream that you hope for?

  • What have you achieved already?

  • What still needs to be done? how, who, when, what, where?

Relationships

  • Analyze your relationships, Family, friends, colleagues, what lessons have you learned from any disagreements you’ve had?

  • Are your relationships healthy?

+ Journalling

  • Always carry a journal, or phone to jot down your thoughts, and ideas

  • You don’t need to write an essay, just jot down what the most important thought is

  • Be intentional with journaling and try to add into a routine write what you want to, ask yourself how could you have done___ differently.

+Delve into your spiritual side

meditate. Speak to your higher power. pray, fast, scream, your spiritual side can be powerful, take the time to chat, think, pray, light a candle, sing a hymn, write.

Question/Thoughts to ask yourself whilst reflecting

  • What is the purpose of my reflection on self-improvement

  • What am I thankful for?

  • What is an experience/es I want to breakdown and think about?

  • What are my skills?

  • What are the actions, thoughts I could try to do differently?

  • What has been 2 achievements I am proud of?

  • How can I be kind to myself, so I can be kind to others?

My reflection of 2019

My Strengths:

  • I have stayed organised by using my diary to keep me on task with the work that is most important and needed to be done first.

  • I can communicate about what I need in health i.e more help one week

  • I have developed a routine and good work ethic, Tuesday morning, Thursday morning and Thursday afternoon a support Worker comes to support me with my work

Weaknesses:

Eating too much chocolate and drinking too much wine that I know is detrimental to my health

Skills:

  • I have great ideas for my writing and have decided to write my second book that is a self-help book about having Resilience.

  • I know what I need and would like. I am determined to make it happen when there are so many obstacles.

Problems:

  • I spend too much money at the fabric store for my sewing hobby

  • My Husband is a messy guy, and it is frustrating that the house looks and feels cluttered

Achievements:

  • Many more book sales on my autobiography, which you can purchase My Beautiful Trauma

  • I got engaged, the wedding is in 20/20

  • I had a very successful Purple May, spreading awareness for Lupus, Fibromyalgia and stroke month!

Happiness:

I have the kindest and most generous man! And our little girl, who we adopted in February (who’s a cat) called Annie.

Solutions

I will try to be a little less bothered by the extra clutter in the house.

I will continue to live everyday life to the fullest!

  • Reflections Of Life

  • Reflections

  • Mental Toughness

  • Highs And Lows

  • 2019

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